Friday, December 13, 2013

world cup draw: group h



Yeah, tough draw. If you're American or English, I mean. If you're French, congratulations, you lucky bastards, who've barely scraped through only to find yourself a place in the sun, fighting folks like Switzerland (see Orson Welles' observations about the Swiss and cuckoo clocks in the Third Man). And my Argentines have got what looks to be a fairly cushy ride into the Round of 16, or I hope so, as I'm counting on La Albiceleste to take the whole shootin' match, the whole nine yards, the entire ball of proverbial wax. This is the year, this tournament at arch-rival Brasilia, this is the time for my boy Leo to stake his claim as the greatest footballer who ever lived. This is his moment, and I'm brooking no argument about this. It means too much to me. I've always been a Spain fan, but I'm letting my Spaniards have the year off. This trophy belongs to Argentina.

But on to Group H. I thought I'd start here because these are the folks about whom I know the least.

Algeria, for example. Les Fennecs, or the Desert Foxes. Their footballing road has been harsh and uncomfortable as their political road. In 1982, the World Cup was in Spain and West Germany were the reigning champs, but that didn't stop Algeria from upsetting the apple cart by beating their Teutonic foes on opening day, 2-1; this after the Germans had mocked their unknown rivals heartlessly in a pre-game press conference ("We will dedicate out seventh goal to our wives, our eighth to our dogs"). The Foxes, remember, were a team whose origin lay in the freedom fighters of the decades previous, and there was a strong sense of national honor at stake. The upset led to one of the great scandals in World Cup history: it was West Germany v Austria on the last day of group stage. If West Germany won, then both Germanic sides would go through, but if Austria won, it would go through with Algeria, who had already played their final match. In the tenth minute, Germany scored, and then both sides effectively stopped playing. Algerians in the crowd waved money at the mercenaries, German fans burned their own national flags in protest, Spaniards shouted, "Fuera! Fuera!" and waved hankies, a delightful tradition in showing disdain.

So Algeria was out, and the world knew the Huns were cheaters and cynics. When their own German fans showed up at their hotel to protest, the unrepentant players pelted them with water balloons. The debacle led to a new FIFA ruling: all final group stage matches are played simultaneously now, to circumvent the temptation to the cynical cheat and the Biscuit Ending.

Then, in 2010 qualifying for South Africa, Algeria's hopes lay on a final showdown against Egypt in Cairo. Before the match, their bus was violently attacked by hooligans, and several members of the team injured. They lost the ensuing match, and the scandal led to a diplomatic dyspepsia between the two countries, resulting in a shutting off of trade. (The Foxes still managed to scrape through into the Group Stage, where they tied with England, but headed home after losing to both the United States and Slovenia.)

Then there's South Korea, the Taegeuk Warriors, starring Park Chu-Young from Arsenal, hometown hero Lee Keun-Ho of Sangju Sangmu Phoenix, and Bayer Leverkusen striker Son Heung-Min, all formidable forwards. The coach is Hong Myung-Bo, the Korean Republic's most-capped player and ex-L.A. Galaxy defender. These Warriors made it into the draw by the skin of their teeth, beaten by Iran, but still sanguine. This is South Korea's ninth appearance. Its best moment of shining glory was in 2002, beating Italy 2-1 in the Knockout then Spain in penalties in the Quarterfinals. In 2010, they made it into Knockouts but were ousted by berserker Diego Forlan and his back-up Uruguayans.

About Russia I can glean little, other than running across chilling headlines in my search ("Russia Chief Quits After Meeting With Vladimir Putin". Brrrr). Currently managing is Fabio Capello, a man who's enjoyed a success or two in his time (OK, and a failure or two as well), and all the players seem to be culled from home-country teams except one: Denis Cheryshev plays in the front line at Sevilla. The last I remember these guys was from the 2008 European Cup. Gus Hiddink (previously seen managing the intrepid Soccaroos in 2006 in Germany), was at the helm and they made it into the Semifinals, but my Spanish boys were having what you might call a good day, and the Russians headed home after that.

The fourth side are the Belgians, a team I've never seen before, but after a glance at their line-up, I wonder why that is. From Eden Hazard on down, practically all these guys are top-flight players in the Premiership or La Liga. Their goal-keeper is Thibaut Courtois, currently guarding the net for Atletico Madrid against the likes of Ronaldo and Messi, guiding his team to a second place so solid they're threatening to undermine my Blaugrauna, who currently lead by a slim margin of two goals. And that's just for starts. You've also got Arsenal captain Thomas Vermaelen, Man City's Vincent Kompany, Jan Vertonghen and Mousa Dembele and Nacer Chadli from Spurs, Daniel van Buyten from Bayern Munich, Kevin Mirallas and Romelu Lakaku from Roberto Martinez's wonderful Everton (among others! I'm not even mentioning them all).

And their mascot is a lion named Benelucky, which is sweet, right? These guys are going to be gangbusters in Brazil, and I can't wait to watch them play.

Prediction: I see Belgium going through on top, with Russia squeaking past South Korea for runner-up.

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